How we learn lessons in life isn't easy. Few people realize consequences 15 seconds before they happen. It takes a while for confidence, show-boatiness, and delusion to wear off. Once that happens, the police show up.
A friend of mine, Ok -- roommate, found himself in a rather hilarious situation. Last night we were having a few beers and he wanted to save all his beer caps. Well we sat on our porch talking and he fumbled his beer cap. The first attempt he captured the loose cap but dropped it again on his way over the 4 foot high guard railing. The second attempt over the railing he picked up the cap. At that simultaneous moment, 5 guys from the third floor of our apartment building yelled for him. They offered him $10 to sod 1 parking spot or roughly 8 rolls of grass .
Quick explanation: "Our building is re-sodding the green spaces so we have better grass, but they didn't finish and rolled sod is sitting in the parking lot." Background on the roommate: He is young and admittedly dumb, so he took the offer. He began rolling sod to roaring chants of support.
The chants only built up ballsiness. He saw a security guards car next to the pile of sod. Most people assume it would be a company car but it's personal. The beer mixed with superficial confidence made a strong bad-decision-cocktail.
He rolled one piece of sod across the hood of the rent-a-cops car then immediately was busted by the grounds crew. The grounds crew live on site with free rent and meager paychecks. Well they take that compensation and position pretty seriously.
He apologized immediately (as most do when caught) to the men. He said, "I'll just roll it back up, it isn't a big deal." They told him, "It isn't about rolling out the sod in the parking spot...look at the car. We are calling security."
Tasers give confidence too, I think a little more than beer and supportive chants. There isn't much to stop anger over a person messing with your belongings but a taser to the chest until someone wets themselves might help. As a spectator I was relieved, well OK not relieved, I laughed pretty hard. I'd never seen a real-life tasing. If you haven't I suggest you find your dumb friend and pay him $10.
Scene: My buddy in a Kevin Garnet jersey (Celtics) getting tazed until his passes out and pees himself is what MasterCard means, priceless.
The security guard told the police, "He attempted to flee so I stopped him with my taser." The roommate in cuffs didn't dispute that claim. He appeared a little groggy still from his taser ride to never-never land.
At the end he was released with no charges. The police viewed it as a civil matter not criminal. The police, I assume, know the difference between a prank and crime.
I'll admit though, I wanted my friend to go to jail a little. Just to learn a lesson of what can happen if you do screw around a bit too much in life. He is young so he still needs to learn but he didn't learn shit because people are cockier than ever when released from police with only a warning.
So try to think 15 seconds ahead of time. Because after that the cops will arrive. Or you'll get tased and you friends will have a good laugh at your expense.
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